back by popular demand, Rapmeister DJ Dr.Zee

i don't know what he was smoking when he wrote this, but this is a work of art.

ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, i give you "the story of IRC race 2".

Race 2: Race to the hood

The horn went and as like all you chill out fellas know, we were rockin' to the beat. There were cries on the boat as we were wondered whether those were gunshots or to signal the start of the next race. We sure did not want to be caught off guard.

"What does a raised blue and white flag mean? Isn't it only one race?"

Who said it was immaterial but what we knew was that crew rabbitz was back in the game.

We rushed to the scene close to the start line, this time we stuck to the uncrowded port side as we were determine not to cross the line last again.

30 seconds to the start. Time was a tickin’ and the boat was cruisin’. Unfortunately we spotted a line of boats cruisin’ down the start line on starboard tack while we were on the port tack hence we had to choice but to give to those niggas' coming down the East side. We had no idea we would be out manouved in this manner. What resulted was a series of chaos as boats cruised by on our left and right as we tacked and tacked to avoid collision.

Within a minute we are all left for dead, once again last and motionless as all the winds and momentum was taken from our sails. Battered and bruised but not walkin’ with a limp, we promised to exact revenge for the brotherhood and so we pumped up the mains and headed down the starboard in chase of two(two boats in front that is yoz).

Position-wise we were done for, the two ahead had bigger sails and we were covered once again we were given the dirrrty windz. We had planned to tack below the two and perhaps take advantage of the clearer route on the port. However someone must have been watching, for just was we were to do so, a gap opened up between the two boats which we were able to exploit. Like the love for fast cars, we beared down to gain speed and went in-between the two where were able to gain a tacit advantage due to the winds blowing through.

Brother Tim predicted the one behind the two would tack away eventually and this would be our opportunity to tack alongside, gain clear winds and perhaps point a little higher to overtake the tacking boat. We lacked the guns but through this massive insight, everything went as planned and we found ourselves cruisin’ down the plain in chase of the chicks far ahead (note: I was fairly blind so I do not really know if those bikini girls were chicks).

When we got to the layline, we wanted to play it cool. There were shouts of “playing it safe” but you and I know we can never win playing safe. We overshot the layline by 5 boat lengths and in the hood no mistakes can be tolerated. I mean A.L.V.I.N knows his shitz but one mistake like that can cost us the whole mutha f.ing race. The backtracking did it damage and we lost a couple of places which was crucial in this race.

The way back to the hood was filled with tactical insights from A.L.V.I.N. He told us there was a wind chokehold and hence the zigzag motion of pointing when its light and and bearing when it heavy downwind. If you didn't get datz you need to go back to school sucker. The jibes were pretty rough like the hangover you get after a night out in da club. But it was still cool as we were able to recover quick.

I would like to say that the way back up was like a disco inferno but the truth is the way up was tame but by no means lame. During this period we consolidated our arms as we approached the layline. This time round A.L.V.I.N decided to use the over the shoulder method which requires you to look over the shoulder on your right before deciding to tack it to the layline. It was a huge gamble but we were ready risk it and get rich or die trying.

I was eaves’ on a conversation between Shi and Fio and it was pretty cool. Shi was pretty thirsty and wanted a drop from the box. Their talk went a little something like this.

Shi: “Can I get a…”

Flo: “What? What?”

Shi: “Can I get a…”

Flo: “What? What?”

Shi: “Can I get a bottle of water?”

Rounding the mark, everything was in order and we managed to pull up the spin and get movin’ in two boat lengths. It was the last leg and immortality laid ahead.

We all thought it would be over just like dat
Suddenly the winds stopped turning boats into cats

Platu was light and cruising down fast
1,2,3 were the boats we pass

We had ALVIN as the helms, there was no worry
Loo Wee at the trims; experience our fury.

A jibe to the left, a jibe to the right
The crews they hollered but they were just getting smaller
It was too late as they tired their thing
The finish was in sight and so the championship ring.

So just in case you hommies didn’t hear it right
I will say it again so remember to hold it tight
The derigging bros are comin’ to get ya
We will rock your boats and we’ll surely pawn ya.

So terrorise us at the R.S.Y.C
cause all you little fags are gonna be D.E.A.D
Crew rabbitz in the house when we secure the 4
Come next we’ll be first while the compe’s on the floor.

word.